8 July 2013
Today, Monday 8th July
2013... marks probably the saddest day of my life. In the early hours of this
morning I lost my Grandfather. I was only blessed with one grandfather in this
life and I believe he was the greatest man ever. The lessons he taught me have
proved to be beyond valuable and his love for his family like nothing in this
world. This post is dedicated to his memory and the amazing man he was and will
forever be in our hearts.
Born 12 February 1922, with a family of
seven sisters and two brothers that lived in Randfontein. I could never forget
the story of how he ran away from school on his very first day, only to have
his sister chase him to bring him back.
At the young age of 18, he went to
fight in the western desert during World War II. He often had stories of war;
most that he told us were entertaining. Stories of rats in the trenches, or his
friend who cheated death when then rivet on the top of his helmet was shot off.
When he returned he worked for South
African Railways. In November of 1946 he married the love of his life, Myrtle Young.
Their marriage of 66 and a half years is one that taught their family and loved
ones just what the commitment of marriage means as well as showed us all the
meaning of true and selfless love. One time when Grampa was in hospital,
although he was the sick one, he was constantly worried about Granny, and if
she was comfortable and okay.
He was a man of God, and his faith
along with Granny’s made for an inseparable bond between them. The night before
their 65th wedding anniversary, I slept over in their spare room and
I witnessed the most incredible thing. I was lying in my bed reading while they
were getting ready for bed. We said good night and not long after I heard
Grampa’s voice in what sounded like a constant ramble of mumbling. Straining my
ears to try and make out what exactly he was saying, I finally realised that he
was reading from the Bible. When he had finished he said a prayer, and my heart
melted as they shared an “Amen”. That moment I realised that their marriage was
based on a mutual love for God and a commitment not only to each other but to
God as well. An incredible life lesson for all of us.
Together they had four lovely
daughters: Gail, Beryl, Yvonne and Ivy who gave them 9 grandchildren and 5
great-grandchildren with a sixth on the way. Family meant everything to my
Grampa, and to be surrounded by his large family was all he ever wanted.
He was a true gentleman. He would
always step aside to let you in the door before him. He often would say to me “Age
before beauty” and send me through the door first. He was probably the
friendliest man in our neighbourhood, saying hello or waving to anyone who
walked past the gate on one of his numerous daily patrols of the property. He
was always concerned about us when we were on the road, whether it was a long
trip down to the coast, or a short trip to varsity. And whenever I would tell
him I was on my way out, he insisted on checking if I had petrol and that my
oil and water were all fine. I’ll still hear his voice in the back of my head
when I get in the car to go out “Do you have oil and water? You don’t want to
get stuck, Nic!”
When I think of my Grampa, one thing
that has to come to mind is ice-cream. And I think anyone who knows him would
agree! If Grampa didn’t want ice-cream after lunch, something was very wrong! Even
on the coldest day in winter Grampa would insist on a bowl of ice-cream, and
sometimes would ask for seconds especially if it came with custard.
Another thing I will never forget is
the mornings when Grampa would take me to school. There would always be a Super
C or two sitting on the bonnet waiting for me and my brother. On the way he
would always sing songs to us such as “Heigh Ho, Heigh Ho and off to work we go”,
“Daar kom die Alabama” or “I love to go a-wandering along the highland road.
And as I go I love to sing, a knapsack on my back, valderie, veldera, valderie,
veldera-ha-ha-ha-ha, my knapsack on my back-b-back-back-back”. He also had his
catch phrases that I’ve even used a few times like:”All clear on the Western
front!” (Translation: There are no cars coming from the left side). I remember when
I was in pre-school, Grampa would turn on the heater when it was cold and since
we always arrived at school too early, once he’d parked I would climb into the
front seat to warm my hands in front of the fan. Another fond memory from my
primary school days was when Grampa would fetch us in the afternoon, he would
always bring my brother and I a small bottle of cola or creme soda flavoured
soda steam. Even when he didn’t fetch us, he would send soda stream with mom.
It was the small things he did that
made him a great man. If I had to write about all the great deeds and things I’ll
remember about my Grampa, I could probably write a novel. He was more than just
a grandfather to me, he was a best friend. It’s not going to be easy to live
without him around; I know I’ll still hear his whistle from the back door when
I’m in the kitchen, or picture his hand signals to tell me that it’s raining,
when I see raindrops begin to fall. But all these things I shall keep in my heart
forever, and spread love and friendliness around the way he could.
The thing that breaks my heart the
most is that he won’t be here to see my brother and I graduate. It was
something he always said: “I’ll be there in the front row when you walk across
the stage”. I believe it was one thing he really wanted in this life: to see us
all succeed in what we do. That is why I will dedicate my degree to him, to his
memory. Because I know when graduation day comes, he will have the best seat in
the house, from above!
When I looked up the exact words to
the “Happy Wanderer” song, and discovered many more verses than Grampa used to
sing. Reading through the lyrics, I could just picture Grampa singing those
words, they were a perfect description of how he lived, and will continue to live
in our hearts and memories.
The Happy Wanderer
I love to go a-wandering,
Along the mountain track,
And as I go, I love to sing,
My knapsack on my back.
Chorus:
Val-deri,Val-dera,
Val-deri,
Val-dera-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha
Val-deri,Val-dera.
My knapsack on my back.
I love to wander by the stream
That dances in the sun,
So joyously it calls to me,
"Come! Join my happy song!"
I wave my hat to all I meet,
And they wave back to me,
And blackbirds call so loud and sweet
From ev'ry green wood tree.
High overhead, the skylarks wing,
They never rest at home
But just like me, they love to sing,
As o'er the world we roam.
Oh, may I go a-wandering
Until the day I die!
Oh, may I always laugh and sing,
Beneath God's clear blue sky!
On Sunday afternoon when I last saw
Grampa, before I left I said to him: “I’ll come see you tomorrow, and I’ll
bring Granny”. I’m sad to say I couldn’t keep my word. Even though tomorrow may
not be Monday 8th July as I intended, the day I see him again will
be our “tomorrow”.
In
Loving Memory
Bertie
Cortes Spenceley
12
February 1922 - 8 July 2013
Love you forever, Gramps!
Forever in my heart and always in my memory.
Now You can go a-wandering in a new
place until we meet again.
I’ll come see you tomorrow.
Love,
Your Gogga <3
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Back in the day! |
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23 November 1946- Their Wedding Day |
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True Love! |
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The Four Daughters (From left: Yvonne, Beryl, Gail and baby Ivy) |
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Family Holiday |
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With their four daughters- 50th Wedding Anniversary 1996 |
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The Grandchildren |
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The whole family in about 1998/9 (not too sure) |
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Some of the family 2011- 65th Wedding Anniversary |
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Their 60th Wedding anniversary November 2006 |
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Christmas 2012 |
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My favourite picture! Posing on Christmas Day 2012 |